It is not my repentance on which I depend, but on your forgiveness.
For my trust is not in my own efforts, but in your generosity.
Just as my righteousness is a gift of your grace, not earned by my goodness.
Like in a game of “Who blinks first” between lovers, your forgiveness is not dependent on my repentance, but it is given as I repent.
And my repentance flows from my confession, as my confession flows from my sorrow.
All dependant on beholding your love.
It is the aching heart, longing to be like you, that calls forth my repentance;
A sin – a falling short of aiming for you – that is redeemed from a destructive wound into a foundation for new life.
Penitent, I am called to approach you; approaching you, I behold you; beholding you I am restored.
So, my repentance becomes my greatest joy, for it reconnects me to you.
I am recalled to the deepest truths, and truth leads me into goodness, and dwelling in truth and goodness fills me with all joy.
Straying, I lost my way; restored, I am home again.
All that was lost, receding, dwindling into the far distance, and hurting far more for seeing it depart, comes flooding back, and bathing in your forgiving love, I am refreshed and reinvigorated, ready to sing again, ready to follow.
Without you, strength and wisdom, and the pride in them, quickly crumbles into confusion and fear, and I am lost.
Thinking to manage by myself, I am imprisoned by folly and blindness;
Resting in you, I am clear sighted and uplifted.
Strength stronger than my strength, wisdom wiser than my wisdom are your gifts to me, held in the pure joy of humble devotion.
In your service, in company with you, I carry responsibility lightly and gladly,
More able, more effective, more joyful than I ever thought possible.
My repentance restores me to your path, your side.
I am not restored to your love, for though I stray from you, you never leave me,
But I am restored to the enjoyment of your love,
To exultation in your love,
And in this I discover that repentance is the door to life in all its fullness,
For fullness of life is to rest upon you, no sorrow in my heart, only joy,
Nothing between us but the bonds of love.
Spiritual Devotion 