In praise of God

In praise of God  

All praise to you, my Lord, my God.

By your great mercies, you have redeemed me.

When I was powerless, when I was incapable of doing anything to remedy my errors and my defects, you set me free.

Not for any promises I might make of future faithfulness, but purely from your grace. For it is your nature to have mercy, and we now, and always, depend on your grace. You love us – for it is your nature to love. Still, you do not have to love us, but you do. Never failing to love us, yet, out of love for us, you respect even our sins, allowing us freedom to depart from you – though you never depart from us. Latent with love, you wait only for us to stop resisting you. Even before our response, you pour into our souls your forgiveness till we are ready to turn to you again.

And it is in forgiveness that we are redeemed. Pouring your goodness, truth and love into our lives, you restore our relationship with you, which alone gives us life, allows us to stand, and lift up our heads. In forgiveness, we reacquire the ability to turn to you and be healed.

And such healing is found in you as to mend all hurts – and the greatest of hurts is that we turned from you and lost all hope and peace, all soundness of body, mind, heart and soul. Yet such is your cleansing that we are completely clean. Clean as though never soiled, yet also clean in constant awareness that we were not clean, till we accepted your grace. So, we attain a wholeness greater than ever – for having been broken. Still, it would have been better never to have broken, but having broken, in your grace, it becomes a means for even greater grace. Thus, penitence and joy are held in our hearts together, praising you for finding remedy for our sins, and rejoicing in the life restored to us, open to live in union with you, dear Lord.

I will never stop praising you. I gladly commit myself to living to please you. My hope is to walk in step with you forever, but when I find this too hard, I will not despair, but trust in you, and call on you to give grace and yet more grace. With all my heart and soul and mind and strength, I want to know you, and to love you, and to serve you.

Through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

Amen

The importance of being a miserable sinner! Part 5

The importance of being a miserable sinner!

Part 5: Positive change for those who know they are sinners

Thus, there seems to be a fundamental discord between the Christian view and some modern secular views of life. The Christian considers that life is about living up to a standard, while modern ideologies insist on complete freedom from any standard. The secular view seems to be extremely brittle. While the Christian happily accepts their status as a sinner, and embraces a way of life that enables them to come to terms with their mistakes, repent, try to make amends, and try to do better in future, the secular person seems to be just asserting that whatever they happen to be like, and whatever they do, must be deemed to be acceptable. There doesn’t seem to be any means under modern ideology for people to accept that they are not perfect, without thinking that they are therefore not acceptable. This seems to generate a great deal of anger. If you cannot accept any criticism at all without feeling that you are not accepted in society, then there will be a tendency to attack anyone who raises any queries about how you live. This is exactly what we see happening in society today, where intolerant outrage is the order of the day. The Christian idea of being a loved sinner gives a much more robust and beneficial approach to life, for it gives a ready mechanism for understanding that you can be far from perfect, but still fully accepted, and, in fact, more than accepted: completely and utterly loved.

Grow towards the light

Grow towards the light

Come to the light; don’t hide in the shadows.

Yes, the light will show up your blemishes, but you will also see clearly, and be less likely to stumble.

You will see others and allow them to see you, so that you can truly recognise each other and learn from each other.

Bask in the light, exulting in the beauty and wonder that it shows you,

Rejoicing in what is, and in what can become.

Let go of fear and hatred in the light of truth.

Allow goodness to show you the way, even though it takes you far from where you started.

Don’t retreat back into the dark where you feel safe.

Reach out towards the light.

You can absorb more of it than you think.

It will transform you.

Like a butterfly emerging from a chrysalis, your hard exterior needs to crack open.

Yes, this protected you while you needed it, and you might fear it must hurt when it splits and you emerge,

But you will never fly unless you do.

The light is God’s gift to you.

It is filled with his love.

He will show you what to do.

The importance of being a miserable sinner! Part 4

The importance of being a miserable sinner!

Part 4: The distortion of freedom into license

This is linked to the modern emphasis on freedom as the be all and end all of human existence: I demand my right to be completely free. We all love freedom, but, very tellingly, modern ideologies also demand the right never to be criticised, challenged or even questioned, as they see that as oppressive interference in the freedom to do whatever I please: how can I be truly free if someone criticises me and so I feel bad about doing what I want? Freedom is wonderful, but in modern society when the word “freedom” is used, it could often be better translated as “licence”. There are so many terrible things that we need to be freed from, and so many good things that we want to be free to do, but many people who shout for “freedom” really mean: “I demand the right to do whatever I damn well please! – And everyone must approve of this”. It is this false understanding of freedom that fuels the aggressive intolerance that is becoming the trademark of modern society. This hatred and intolerance of challenge suggests to me a subconscious realisation that there are indeed things at fault with me, but I don’t want to face up to it, so I will be incensed at anyone who raises the matter with me. Even if you are deep-down content with the choices you have made, if we truly value freedom, we will have to accept that different people want to use their freedom to do different things. Ironically – tragically – it is often those who trumpet the loudest their demands to be free to live their way of life who refuse to allow the same freedom to others who want to live their life a different way.

True freedom

True freedom

True freedom is found by living in your peace.

Do not leave me to my own devices

Or I will become a slave to my weaknesses,

Imprisoned by the smallness of my soul

And the poverty of my vision.

Bend me to your will,

For only then will I find liberty to live my life to the full.

People mock me that I cannot stand on my own two feet,

That I am forced to obey you rather than being free to express myself.

But wisdom is often counter-intuitive.

In your company I attempt more than I would ever dare alone;

In giving my attention to what you desire, all that is good and pure and lovely in me flowers,

While it is only the unworthy that withers away.

How I wish that I was better trained by your hand.

For the truth is that I am such a slow learner,

So keen to kick back against you and go my own way.

It is only your patient, gracious love that has borne with me

And so allow me to bear fruit – fruit that brings gladness to the soul.

True freedom is a great mystery.

It’s best found in service, in sacrificial love, in self-giving.

If I demand freedom to fully express myself, I am likely to make a fool of myself or hurt others,

But guided, directed, supported by you

I find such joy and peace and love

As to heal all wounds and set me soaring

While avoiding that harm which gloats at expressing myself at another’s expense.

Let me always have your freedom, Lord, and not that which I take for myself.

The importance of being a miserable sinner! Part 3

The importance of being a miserable sinner!

Part 3: The call to live up to a standard

Society’s current difficulties partly arise because of the identity politics movements’ insistence that it is the categories of type of person that count rather than individual attributes of the person. So, against a historical backdrop of women, black people or gay people being deemed not acceptable, it is quite right to say, “This is who I am: I am black or female or gay and that is fine!”. However, in a just society, that should always have been taken for granted. It is just the start of the process. As a Christian, I am not particularly interested in the fact you’re gay or black or female, what I want to know is: “What are you like as a person?”. Are you kind or selfish, gentle or aggressive, a person of integrity or not?

Then, modern ideologies’ weakness is exacerbated by rejecting the concept of a standard to live up to, in order to justify that however I happen to be, must be right. I think this is one source of the spirit of our age, which is instant outrage at any challenge to the individual that there is something not right about what they do. If it is my human right to be myself, then any criticism of me at all is deemed to be an infringement of those rights. And, within the law, we do indeed have the human right to be exactly me. We do not have to be good people, nor altruistic, unselfish, compassionate – we just have to avoid breaking the law. The difference is that the Christian wants more than this. Of course, many secular people want more too. The point of contention seems to be the conflict between those who call people to live up to a standard of goodness and those who want to be free of all standards.

Come to me

Come to me

Let me rest my head on your shoulder;

I find peace in your presence.

I was in turmoil, floundering in confusion

Till I heard your call.

You bid me come to you, and I ran joyfully.

You asked me no questions; just invited me to follow you.

“Walk with me,” you said.

When I stumbled or strayed you corrected me, “No, not like that”,

And taking my hands like a dance partner showed me the way,

“Keep in step with me. Keep up with me. That’s right: like this”.

And so I dance, my whole life a dance – in your embrace.

Thank you for not leaving me by myself.

Thank you for calling me to a higher purpose,

To a deeper, richer way of life.

Thank you for humbling me, for teaching me to let go of my ego.

Thank you for being so patient when I am so unwilling to do this.

Thank you for opening my eyes;

I would barely have known what life is without you.

Most of all, thank you for loving me.

I only love because you first loved me, and showed me how to do it.

You have taught me – sorry, you are still teaching me – how to be still,

How to empty myself to make more room for you.

You have taught me to yearn for more.

And, as often as I open my heart and mind to you,

You pour your gifts into my life.

I am more than I could ever be by responding to your call.

The importance of being a miserable sinner! Part 2

The importance of being a miserable sinner!

Part 2: The modern refusal to accept any criticism

The modern ideology embraced by many people is very different.

The emphasis seems to be on an assertion that I am completely alright as I am. Whatever I happen to be, then that is how I am meant to be; it is 100% acceptable, and anyone who dares to criticise anything about me is condemned. There is a terrible brittleness in this – a fragility, a lack of confidence, a fear that any challenge will cause me to collapse. It seems to reject the idea that I can improve as a person, or that I have the resilience to cope with, and respond positively to, criticism. It also seems to reject the idea that there may be things about myself with which I am not happy and which I want to change. We can see the positives lurking in the background – just as we understand the message behind the perfume advert: each of us does indeed have the human right to be exactly me. We do not have to conform to how anyone else says we should be, or submit to being erased if we differ from the consensus. However, modern ideologies have distorted this positive message into an arrogant and self-righteous assertion that whatever I want to do is beyond reproach. This is a recipe for division and coercion, not least because people will want to do contradictory things, so if we demand that everyone must accept what anyone wants to do we cannot please everyone and conflict must result. Society is losing its ability to debate and learn from each other. Instead, different camps polarise and hurl insults at each other. The Christian emphasis on being a loved sinner allows us to acknowledge our faults, see the good in others – and adopt that goodness as our own – without regarding that as an admission of failure or defeat.

Humility before God

Humility before God

To stand before you is a terrible thing,

Even though I long to be in your presence.

On those rare moments when we feel you are not veiling yourself to protect us,

Awe becomes trembling, edging on the verge of terror.

We do not really have words for it, so we say we are afraid,

But this is not sufficient.

You are just too much for us;

All our fuses blow

And we are exposed before your gaze,

So utterly worthless in comparison.

Yet fear does not tumble into terror

For we are lifted up by our adoration for you.

Held in exquisite tension between fear and love

We acknowledge you to be Lord

And in that we are fulfilled.

We have nothing to say about ourselves,

Nothing that we can offer you

Except to admit our unworthiness,

Even while elation soars through our souls

That we should be here with you.

Finding our thoughts, we babble our confession,

Blurt out our love,

Make extravagant promises,

But really nothing is required.

You are here, and we are face to face with you,

With God, who is before and within and beyond everything.

There is no greater gift or experience or goal.

And when the glory fades enough for us to see ourselves,

We know that we need to be different, to be better, to be other,

And we desire with all our hearts that this should be so,

And we give ourselves to you afresh that your grace may work in us to make it so.

The importance of being a miserable sinner! Part 1

The importance of being a miserable sinner!

This week brings some theological reflection comparing the Christian view that we are sinners, loved by God, with the modern view that we must be considered absolutely right just as we are. 5 parts to come.

(Note: when I say “miserable sinner” I mean it in the humorous sense of the old fashioned preacher thundering at his congregation: “You miserable sinners!”. I hope you detect my joy in accepting the term)

Part 1: Understanding yourself as a sinner is a positive thing

A TV advert for a perfume consists solely of a series of people saying, “I’m perfect. Perfect. Perfect”.

What a destructive lie! No, you are not perfect; no-one is perfect. Very importantly, we do not have to be perfect in order to be accepted, loved, valued. This is one of the mistakes that modern ideologies make: the belief that I must be beyond criticism if I am to be acceptable – and anyone who does criticise me is thereby demeaning me and infringing my human rights.

Christianity has a much healthier attitude because it has a deeper understanding of human nature.

As a Christian, I freely and gladly accept that I am a miserable sinner. But, crucially, I am a sinner who is loved by God. So, although some might regard being a sinner as a depressing, guilt-inducing belief, perhaps counter-intuitively, it is a joyful, liberating belief. I am free to accept that I am far from perfect – but I am still loved. Not that I therefore become blasé about my sins – falsely believing that they don’t matter, because I am loved anyway. My distress for my sins always remains real, and I am continually striving to become a better person, in order to live in tune with the love that God has given me. However, I am able to accept myself and love myself – not because I am perfect, nor even because I am a good person – but because God loves me. God has given me a standard to live up to. I fall short of it, and you might say that without the standard I would not feel so bad, but instead, I am thankful for the standard for it inspires me to try to live up to it, and even when I fail – which is very regularly – I always put more store by God’s forgiving love than by my failure. So, through faith, I have found a way to be myself, as I am, warts and all, while always striving to be better, and often reaching further than I would without my faith in God, while never being distraught and despairing for my failures. Moreover, my understanding of being a miserable sinner not only provides a basis for my life, it also provides the grounds for community life, for, if I value my status as someone who is acceptable despite having flaws and sometimes making mistakes, then I must grant the same to others.