I believe in believing in God. Part 4

I believe in believing in God

Part 4: The greatest mystery of life: the truth loves us

What is he then? What does it mean when we say that we believe in believing in God?

This God that we are exploring is not just an idea. It is an experience. It is a relationship. It is a discovery. It is an energising force. It is a reality. I’ve just used the word “it” because I did not want to prejudge what we have not yet considered, but I want now to write: He is an experience. He is a relationship. He is a discovery. He is an energising force. He is a reality. It really doesn’t matter if you use the word, “she”. The point is that this experience that we discover is a personal experience. We are not making up a philosophy of life – no matter how profound and good. We are discovering a person. I don’t think I can fully explain this, but the reality of what is discovered is why so many people through the ages have said that there is a God. They don’t invent an idea; they confess what they have found. And what they’ve found is an experience of being loved at the heart of life. I don’t know why this is. Perhaps it’s because we are so imbued with personhood and, as God is discovered within us, so we experience this reality as personal. All I can say is that, just as humanity has discovered the reality of the laws of physics in the external universe, so humanity has discovered a reality within the human person that they call God.

I am happy to believe, in accordance with the great chain of faith, that this God is a personally existing being external to me, but for those who cannot accept that, then my testimony is that God is a personally existing being within me. Perhaps I am wrong to use the word “being” in that last sentence, and I am grasping at the word “being” to try and explain what it is I’m experiencing. But at the very least I say with complete confidence that God is a personally existing reality within me. It’s just how things are. It’s what countless people have discovered. Just as America is a country to the far west of Britain which can be discovered if you go that far, so God is waiting to be discovered within you.

This may be hurtful to those who have searched and not found, but maybe it is because they are searching for the wrong thing. Perhaps they are searching for that proof of an external reality when God has (maybe) always been an internal reality. But even this internal reality has proved out of reach for some searchers. What they are searching for is not under their control and so is elusive. However, the person who commits to believing in believing in God has that choice within the control of their will. They can choose to do that, and they know exactly what they are doing.

There is still a whole life of faith to live, for I have just emphasised that this is not a choice to follow a set of principles but is an experienced relationship to discover. Nevertheless, there is a fully solid foundation to build on. You are not like a person leaning over a pond and desperately trying to catch a goldfish with your bare hands – a few people get lucky, but for most it’s just too difficult. And you’re certainly not like a person trying to catch a morning mist in your hands, and so doomed to failure. Instead, you are taking a step of faith. I can verifiably confirm using my natural empirical senses that there is a faith in God that exists, and I commit myself to discovering what this means by giving my life to live by believing in believing in God. With our minds we may always have the understanding that this is what we’re doing, but in practice our experience will simply be that we are believing in God. We will do so with complete clarity of mind and assurance of heart that we are living the best life that could possibly be lived.

We can envisage a community of people who have all consciously committed themselves to living by this faith – a faith that is sure and certain. They believe in believing in God as the answer to their own life’s search for ultimate meaning and value, and as they take up the mission to make the world into the kingdom of God, they believe that their mission is the hope of salvation for us all.